Your Majesty, Please Calm Down / Please Restrain Yourself (Dr. Cutie) 陛下请淡定/ 陛下请自重 (萌医甜妻) by Jiu Xiao Qi (HE)

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• Although most romance novels contain some elements of porn, I would say this book is more raunchy than some. Having said so, I like the book which has a good storyline, and is written with plenty of wit and humor. I noticed the author likes to call His Majesty “huang-san” （皇桑）instead of “huang shang” (皇上), (‘san’ as in ‘ojisan’) which I thought was rather funny.

  The first half was easy to read. There were 2 murders and plenty of narrow escapes for our heroine Tian Qi, a fake eunuch. She LOVES money and when she was sobbing over her loss one day – her latest mistress has just died so there goes her savings used to become her servant - when the Emperor (Ji Heng) dropped by. He mistook her grief to be the mark of a loyal servant and transferred her to Qian Qing Palace to work for him. Ji Heng then found himself unwillingly drawn to his new servant and started his epic struggle to remain straight or deflect over to the dark side. Ha.ha.

  I like the story so much initially that I thought I may want to translate it. Until I got to the middle and then I was like - no way am I going to translate all these steamy stuff! And there were plenty of mention! All are actually quite mild but I did blink when a dildo appeared on screen. I’m not joking. Not only is there a dildo in this era, it can even be temperature-controlled which I thought was rather inventive.

  Anyway to get back to “Your Majesty, Please Stay Calm”, the plot visibly dragged after the half-way mark. Near the 75% mark, I was considering to skip pages but I held on to finish the mystery surrounding the death of Tian Qi’s parents. The side characters were interesting although they exist mainly to move the story along. I’ll give them a brief mention here without spoiling too much of the story:

  Wang Meng:- Tian Qi’s friend, a fellow eunuch who was very talented in differentiating medical herbs. He helped Tian Qi through some tough spots and in return, Tian Qi helped him pursue his dreams of becoming a physician.

  Ji Ru Yi:- Ji Heng’s only son. His mother died when he was very young and his grandmother looks after him currently. He loves playing with Tian Qi and Dai San Shan.

  Dai San Shan:- Royal Tortoise. He has a tendency to bite people besides Tian Qi and Ru Yi.

  Prince Qi/Ji Zheng:- Ji Heng’s younger brother. His mother tried to make him the Crown Prince when he was young, but failed and died. With the throne between them, both brothers were wary of each other. He also fell for Tian Qi but was destined to be the unloved, second lead.

  Imperial Concubines:- There were 4 of them - De, Shu, Kang, and Shun. All wanted to become Empress and were not above using a few tricks to achieve their aim.

  Overall, I would recommend this book since the beginning was rather interesting. To continue or not after the 75% mark, I’ll leave it to the reader.

• Thanks MB for the recommendation & write up. You and your sis are truly Little 7's fans, lol. This is the book Ding Mo was chasing while she was writing Our Best Years so I am sure it is good. I am also fond of Little 7 and he has quite a lot of fans here. Lidge told me Little 7 may be a guy & she wants to marry him, lol. However, nearly all his books start off good but will drag towards the end so I've not managed to finish any yet due to my impatient nature, lol. I feel all his books are good except Heavy Taste so I'll give this a shot when I've time.

• Thanks for the review. This book sounds interesting. How long until the male lead found out that Tian Qi was a girl? It's inevitable as an emperor to have many wifes, but I just don't like the male lead with many wifes.. Sigh..

• I am his fan too...he is the first MALE c-novel author I come across. Love his wit ,humour and pacing... But I agree his modern story are more consistent than his ancient one...Same issue with Fix Smile order. FYI, Tang qi, Ji Heng and ruyi make a guest appearance for about 3 chapters in FSO...thanks MoonBlosson for putting up this book

• Luna:
  Thanks for the review. This book sounds interesting. How long untilthe male lead found out that Tian Qi was a girl? It’s inevitable as an emperor to have many wifes, but I just don’t like the male lead with many wifes.. Sigh..

  Luckily she was his last woman. He only confirmed that 'he' was 'she' at chapter 67, then he literally went roof-hopping crazy because deep down, he really doesn't want to be gay. My god, I can't believe it dragged until chapter 67.... the book has 104 chapters.

• HAHAHAHA! Oh my, Moonblossom, you don't know how surprised I am that you posted it. For a moment, I thought it was Hui'er. Hui'er recommended this to me a few weeks ago and I read it in one zip to chapter 67 and dumped it after. HAHA. It's very funny till the part where the Emperor finds out the eunuch is actually a female, but after that, it's quite painfully draggy. It's also quite yellow!!! So beware.

• Yes - this book is super yellow. D: D: A lot of meat.

  Although the emperor's "am-i-gay-not-gay" suffering is damn good stuff - and how he is so horrified that he is attracted to a eunuch. And his reaction when he found out that his eunuch is NOT a eunuch after all. Hahahaha.

  I confess. I read until she comes clean as a girl to everyone. THen I dropped it and sped off to the last chapter.

• This may be superfluous but you (both Hui3r & decembi) did not miss much. Just one more loop surrounding the death of her parents and how Ji Zheng got the Empress Dowager to be his matchmaker to marry Tian Qi, which got Ji Heng hopping mad as expected, before the happily-ever-after.

  She finally found her parents and buried them but her brother corpse is not among the pile of bones. I suspect her brother is not dead and I'm going to read Tiao XIao Ling to find out if he is going to appear there.

• Hello everyone, I need to claim the credit to be the first to recommend this to everyone lol. Decembi, I still have a copy of my email to you a few mths ago:P MB, I asked you if the book Snow Berries wanna post is this book. Hui3r, you asked me for book recommendation & I suggested this book bcos I know you like this type of book. Oops, I blurt out your secret lol. What I mean is that Hui3r likes to read abt emperor and his harem plus others, lol. Personally, I don't like to read palace novels. Yes, I don't like plenty of novels bcos I am choosy & has short attention span:P I only like Bosses in the novel:P

• Thank you Peanuts, for all the behind-the-scenes action which resulted in this book recommendation!